Check Mate

I was standing on the edge of the train leaning out into the wind. I was only conscious of the wind in my hair and the feel of cold metal which my fists gripped to hold me back from losing myself into the black void outside. A strange aroma arose from the land beyond and I felt one of my eyebrows rise bringing me out of my delusion.

And then I saw them.

They were majestic. Seven of them. With their chests wide, their bodies erect, pride on their faces, poised at the threshold of victory. Their capes fluttered in the wind and as I passed them the whole world seemed to slow down for me, just to watch them. They were soldiers on a chessboard. Only the king, the minister, a knight, 2 horses and a foot soldier of the white army were erect. The king stood, a serene smile on his face, an expression of intense relief signalling the end of an era. The king of the black army seemed to be squatting his hands entangled in his hair, the lonely emperor of a lost battle. Then as a I came closer to them I saw them standing in the strangest posture- their heads were bent and one hand was placed between their legs. Then I saw the stream of urine spout from their anatomy.

ONE TIGHT SLAP!

This is all I wanted to give them. But I was helplessly hanging almost outside the train and could only avert my eyes from them. Why do men in the city of Mumbai suffer from incontinence? On the tracks, into the drains, by the side of the roads thousands of bladders empty by day and through the night. What do women do then? They LOOK for loos or control themselves. But for men the whole world is their loo, isnt it? This incident makes me deter from touching any guy's hands. Forget contraceptives the government should start supplying free Foleys catheter to the Mumbai men. At least it won't stink as much. So much for my chessmen.